on your own.
Very simple statement, right? Very "duh"... and yet, it was so important that I was reminded of that. It can be easy to just get caught up in your own life, especially when you're young, single, and in school. You have to study- alone- and you're not really accountable to anyone as far as the rest of your time goes. At JPII, we have awesome students but it seems sometimes that our minds are so tired from studying God that we don't take the time out to talk about Him personally with each other.
Last monday, I sat with two CUA wretches for a long while and just talked. It brought such life back into my heart, and gave me profound peace and joy. We need each other! There was not a word said about how long any of us spend in prayer with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, but I left convicted to spend more. Not a word about people we struggle to love, yet I left knowing I wanted to love them better. An hour or 2 with a couple holy girls, and they reminded me that I want to be a saint! Do not settle for mediocrity!!!! Our HF always said that. That's a real choice, right there. Do you want to go to church, pray, attempt to love and serve, or do you want to be fully present at mass, pray without ceasing and without counting minutes, love and serve your neighbor next to you and your brother on the street equally? I fail at this every single day. I will probably fail every day of my life. But Jesus wants us to be saints, and He will not leave us on our own. We can choose to shut Him out, but He will always be calling us to "become what you are."
We all need a community... If religious, it has to be an order that you can entrust your soul to! If married, the man you marry has to be able to guide your soul to heaven! These are not small details. While the wretches are waiting, we should be establishing these criteria. Be careful with your heart! Keep your eyes on the future- the eschatological future- and see all things as they are in eternity. Our lives go by in the blink of an eye, and in the end, what matters? Were you faithful? Did you love? To be granted the grace to gaze forever at the face of God, to be at the wedding feast of the Lamb and united in love to all who came before or after you who loved... what else could possibly matter? (except bringing as many souls with you as possible!)
I don't know if anyone reads this, but if anyone out there has any advice for the wretches, in terms of waiting, discernment, patience, or qualities to look for before marriage, please post it!